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Vacation Plans In Mexico

I was going to post this in the Illegals in the USA thread, but decided it has really too much sarcasm. However, it hits directly home on all counts.

Dear President Bush:

I'm about to plan a little trip with my family and extended family, and I would like to ask you to assist me. I'm going to walk across the border from the U.S. into Mexico, and I need to make a few arrangements. I know you can help with this.

I plan to skip all the legal stuff like visas, passports, immigration quotas and laws. I'm sure they handle those things the same way you do here.

So, would you mind telling your buddy, President Vicente Fox, that I'm on my way over? Please let him know that I will be expecting the following:

1. Free medical care for my entire family.

2. English-speaking government bureaucrats for all services I might need, whether I use them or not.

3. All government forms need to be printed in English.

4. I want my kids to be taught by English-speaking teachers.

5. Schools need to include classes on American culture and history.

6. I want my kids to see the American flag flying on the top of the flag pole at their school with the Mexican flag flying lower down.

7. Please plan to feed my kids at school for both breakfast and lunch.

8. I will need a local Mexican driver's license so I can get easy access to government services.

9. I do not plan to have any car insurance, and I won't make any effort to learn local traffic laws.

10. In case one of the Mexican police officers does not get the memo from Pres Fox to leave me alone, please be sure that all police officers speak English.

11. I plan to fly the U.S. flag from my house top, put flag decals on my car, and have a gigantic celebration on July 4th. I do not want any complaints or negative comments from the locals.

12. I would also like to have a nice job without paying any taxes, and don't enforce any labor laws or tax laws.

13. Please tell all the people in the country to be extremely nice and never say a critical word about me, or about the strain I might place on the economy.

I know this is an easy request because you already do all these things for all the people who come to the U.S. from Mexico. I am sure that Pres Fox won't mind returning the favor if you ask him nicely.

However, if he gives you any trouble, just invite him to go quail hunting with your V.P.

Mexico Plans Vacation

This one comes really close to not belonging in this section either. While it is amusing, it touches on so many controversial issues that it doesn't make me laugh, it makes me want to strike back at some of the things said in it.

Vacation Plans In Mexico Games Forum & Humor Jokes

I agree, the statements are more of a political rant with sarcasms. Maybe it should be placed in the 'What's Bothering You?' Board.

Mexico Plans Vacation

But isn't this the best type of political humor? Use the real situation in a humorous way?

I did grin at a lot of it. Fun commentary.

Mexico Plans Vacation

I'd be happy to post a copy to another board if it's appropriate Then more folks could see it and discuss. But where's the best place?

People used to joke (sort of) about annexing Baja California, since most of the population were trying to be American anyway. Seems the joke is on *us* and *they* are going to annex SoCalif, SoAriz, SoTexas, New Mexico, SoUtah, and parts of Colorado.

Vacation Plans In Mexico

This is a targeting post (not really a joke or at least nothing humorous in my opinion) and I fear that people who read it will wonder about our policy about sarcasm and stereotyping. Like I said... it seems like a 'What's bothering You?' issue if you are looking for Discussion.

Vacation Plans Mexico

No, not really looking for a lot of discussion, actually. I think it stands on its own to either amuse or intrigue. Yes, I realize the sarcasm was a bit much for a regular thread, which, as I mentioned, was why I put it here.