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The main thing to focus on is the love. We - Page 2 - Mormon Doctrine Studies - Posted: 26th Jul, 2012 - 7:47pm
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Mormons & Same Sex Attraction - Page 2
Before I post this, I want to say that you need not think I have a problem or an addiction, or that I am homosexual. I am sharing these thoughts from my experience because I believe they shed light on the subject at hand.
There was a time in my life, around my junior or senior year of High School, when I suddenly felt a need to seriously question my sexual identity. I was involved in drama and music, and the group of friends who came along with those activities didn't help the situation. I never acted on my curiosity, nor did I share it. Mercifully, I had the anchor of the restored gospel as a standard - I knew that the messages I saw and heard around me were wrong. However, that didn't make my bad thoughts and questions disappear on their own. I felt guilty for a long time.
Part of the healing process is identification of what went wrong, when and where. Here are a few things that influenced me negatively. I share them in a spirit of friendly warning.
1. Obsession with competition. As men in the world today, we are always being told we are not big enough, strong enough, fast enough, or smart enough. These beliefs lead to obsession with ones physical body and temporal possessions. That leads to constant comparison with peers. A man who habitually watches other men to compare physical size, strength, intelligence, or assets may easily be convinced that he is homosexual. He mistakes extended jealousy for love.
2. Stereotypes. In high school, I had an aversion to sports, fads, popular music, and dating. I was not particularly attracted to men, but since I was unlike my male peers in many aspects, and since I didn't feel a strong desire for any particular girls I knew, I felt abnormal.
3. Culture of tolerance. The school system pummeled my class for years with sensitivity training. I agree that racial, economic, religious, and gender discrimination are wrong and must be addressed, but the result of our years of 'tolerance' was a culture in which it was difficult to have a moral stand on anything. Around my friends, who usually accepted my LDS standards, I found it nearly impossible to discuss the issue of homosexuality, lest I offend anybody.
Yes, I addressed the issue. It has not ruined my life. I am not repressing my 'real self;' I am simply choosing to leave certain deceptions behind me permanently. I testify that homosexuality is a choice, and I chose NO.
After giving that background, do I feel guilty about my thoughts and my curiosity from that period? Sometimes.
Do the thoughts return? Occasionally. But now I have grown enough in the gospel to have a testimony of WHY marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God. There is no question for me as to the necessity of that goal in my life.
Do I feel guilty when past feelings return? Yes, thankfully. The discomfort of guilt when I remember these images serves as a red flag, and I know I need to be especially careful, as they are addictive.
Should I really feel guilty? Yes, but not constantly. The guilt I feel now about past transgressions is short-term guilt that extends not far beyond the actual thought. I do not walk under constant gloom because I was once stupid, but I use the painful memory to deter me from other, similar sin.
Attraction Sex and Mormons
Is there really a way to "diminish same-sex attractions and overcome homosexual behavior"?
| QUOTE |
| When she married her husband Lester in a 1981 LDS temple wedding, Barbara Leavitt had big plans. "I was going to be the best wife ever," she said this week with a small, rueful laugh. But Barbara always knew there was a part of Lester she'd never reach, some secret, private place filled with thoughts and feelings he'd never share. In 2006, after 25 years of marriage, it all came out - or rather, Lester did. For most of his life, Lester struggled with his attraction to other men, avidly seeking help and reading literature from organizations that claimed to help gay people become heterosexual or to help weaken attraction to others of the same sex. The material he received did more harm than good, Lester said, which is why the couple demonstrated outside Evergreen International's Salt Lake City headquarters on Tuesday morning. Evergreen is a resource for members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints that, according to its Web site, helps people "diminish same-sex attractions and overcome homosexual behavior.... |
Mormons & Same Sex Attraction Studies Doctrine Mormon
The Church just released a new pamphlet dealing with the issue of Same-Sex attraction. It is interesting that over the years, the Church had released a couple of pamphlets dealing with this same issue but the tone was very different. In the 1974 version, it described homosexuality as "evil" and even suggested parents were to blame for it. We can all remember Pres Kimball saying homosexuality was an "abomination". The 1983 revision de-emphasized the "psycho-social causes" of homosexuality and the 1992 version eliminated parental blame altogether, pointing to the possibility of biological factors. Would be absolutely insane to say that ONE day the Church MAY accept homosexual marriages based on the wordings and approach of this whole issue nowdays?
Here are some excerpts of the new pamphlet:
| QUOTE |
| In some circumstances a person defers marriage because he or she is not presently attracted to a member of the opposite gender. While many Latter-day Saints, through individual effort, the exercise of faith, and reliance upon the enabling power of the Atonement, overcome same-gender attraction in mortality, others may not be free of this challenge in this life. However, the perfect plan of our Father in Heaven makes provision for individuals who seek to keep His commandments but who, through no fault of their own, do not have an eternal marriage in mortal life. As we follow Heavenly Father's plan, our bodies, feelings, and desires will be perfected in the next life so that every one of God's children may find joy in a family consisting of a husband, a wife, and children. In addition to filling your garden with positive influences, you must also avoid any influence that can harm your spirituality. One of these adverse influences is obsession with or concentration on same-gender thoughts and feelings. It is not helpful to flaunt homosexual tendencies or make them the subject of unnecessary observation or discussion. It is better to choose as friends those who do not publicly display their homosexual feelings. Some people have been abused during the early years of life or have engaged in sexual experimentation at a young age. If this has happened to you, please understand that abuse by others or youthful experiences should not create a present sense of guilt, unworthiness, or rejection by God or His Church. Innocent mischief early in life does not predispose a youth toward same-gender attraction as an adult. |
Page 2 Attraction Sex and Mormons
That is kind of funny. I am noticing that the Church is taking a harder tone or should I say a definite tone in what they want everyone to do and the truth is I could not agree more! I have always said that if you are gay then the whole world does not need to know. Being gay and advertising that you are gay are two different things. If you wish to advertise then you do not need to be around me, neither would I want my children around you.
Post Date: 29th Aug, 2007 - 5:17pm / Post ID: #
Attraction Sex and Mormons
I think Nighthawk summed up the argument best, in that one must have desires in one's heart and inwardly lust. Passing thoughts do not equate to that standard (in my mind). I would consider those merely temptations of Satan that were not entertained.
God 1 - Satan 0
Regarding God's acceptance of gay marriage in the future? I find that extremely hard to fathom. I cannot think of any act for which God has at one point in time required execution and then done an about-face, and actually "blessing" such acts.
Were that to happen, I might seriously question my belief in God (or that God had any hand in writing the Old Testament) or the Church that espoused such a belief. Thankfully, I do not consider this to be a substantial risk. 
Edited: tortdog on 29th Aug, 2007 - 5:18pm
Mormons & Same Sex Attraction
According to Elder Bruce C. Hafen, a member of the First Quorum of the Seventy who spoke at the 19th annual conference of Evergreen International, a nonprofit group that helps Mormons "overcome homosexual behavior" and "diminish same-sex attraction": Homosexuality "Not in your DNA".
QUOTE People who are attracted to members of their own sex can change, an LDS general authority said Saturday, so they shouldn't let Satan persuade them they can't.
Elder Bruce C. Hafen, a member of the First Quorum of the Seventy, spoke at the 19th annual conference of Evergreen International, a nonprofit group that helps Mormons "overcome homosexual behavior" and "diminish same-sex attraction." The event was held at the LDS Church's Joseph Smith Memorial Building in Salt Lake City.
Hafen promised attendees, "If you are faithful, on resurrection morning -- and maybe even before then -- you will rise with normal attractions for the opposite sex."
Whenever the devil -- whom Hafen referred to as "the adversary" -- tries to "convince you that you are hopelessly 'that way,' so that acting out your feelings is inevitable, he is lying," Hafen said. "He is the father of lies."
Last month, the American Psychological Association passed a resolution advising mental health professionals against telling their clients they can change their sexual orientation through therapy or other treatments.
No solid evidence exists that such efforts work, the APA concluded, and some studies suggest the potential for harm, including depression and suicidal tendencies. A task force reviewed 83 studies on sexual-orientation change conducted since 1960.
The "long-standing consensus" of the behavioral and social sciences, the APA noted, is that homosexuality is a "normal and positive variation of human sexual orientation."..
Mormons & Sex Attraction - Page 2
The main thing to focus on is the love. We love each other regardless about whom we feel attracted too. I have mixed thoughts on this because I think we really do not know what people who feel attracted to the same gender are going through.
TOPIC: Mormons & Same Sex Attraction