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Jokes about Men - Page 2

QUOTE

The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger.......Whoosh....immediately he turned ninety!!! Gotta love that fairy! Â

Why? wouldn't the woman have been happier if it made her 30 instead of him 90? afterall most women are 29 and holding forever...  ;D

Men Jokes

QUOTE

afterall most women are 29 and holding forever..

I will let you know next year when I turn 29 :

Jokes about Men Games Forum & Humor Jokes

QUOTE

I will let you know next year when I turn 29 :

Don't you mean 25?...

Page 2 Men Jokes

There were 11 people hanging onto a rope that came down from a helicopter. Ten were men, and one was a woman. They all decided that one person should get off because if they didn't, the rope would break and everyone would die. No one could decide who should go, so finally the woman gave a very touching speech about how she would give up her life to save the others because women were used to giving up things for their husbands and children and giving in to men.

And all of the men started clapping....

Men Jokes

The Five Secrets To A Great Relationship

1. It is important to find a man who works around the house, occasionally cooks and cleans and who has a job.

2. It is important to find a man who makes you laugh.

3. It is important to find a man who is dependable, respectful and doesn't lie.

4. It is important to find a man who is a fantastic lover.

5. It is important that these four men never meet.

Jokes about Men

What He Says - What He Means

"I'm going fishing."
Really means: "I'm going to stand by a stream with a stick in
my hand all day, while the fish swim by in complete safety."
"It's a guy thing."
Really means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected
with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."

"Can I help with dinner?"
Really means: "Why isn't it already on the table?"

"Uh-huh." "Sure, honey." "Yes, dear."
Really means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

"It would take too long to explain."
Really means: "I have no idea how it works."

"We're going to be late."
Really means: "Now I have a legitimate excuse to drive like a maniac."

"Take a break, honey, you're working too hard."
Really means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

"That's interesting, dear."
Really means: "Are you still talking?"

"Hey, I've got my reasons for what I'm doing."
Really means: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."

"I can't find it."
Really means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched
hands, so I'm completely clueless."

"You know I could never love anyone else."
Really means: "I am used to the way you yell at me
and realize it could be worse."

"You look terrific."
Really means: "Please don't try on one more outfit. I'm starving."

"I'm not lost. I know exactly where we are."
Really means: "No one will ever see us alive again."