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Who Asks?

Here is something to consider... is it right for a woman to ask the man in marriage, or should that be the man's 'job'?

From CS Monitor:

An uncommon proposal
New Age woman pops age-old question - but who got the ring? By
Elizabeth Armstrong
https://www.csmonitor.com/2003/0520/p09s02-coop.html

Asks Who

That was a delightful little article about the woman that proposed. last week I went to this activity at church and they got all the married couples to do a little questionnaire which included questions like: What song was playing when you first danced, when did you meet your spouse, what was your first movie and where did your spouse propose. 80% of the couples had been married for over 40 years and could not remember half of the answers but one thing that they all had specific memories of, was who had proposed and where the proposal was. I don't think it matters who it is in this day and age, personally, but I know for my wife it seemed more romantic coming from me.....this may be due to romanticism on T.V. or the movies. With Tongan tradition it is the gentleman that proposes. I've heard of women proposing but never buying the ring!..that's great! when it feels right there's no time to lose!

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To answer the initial question, I don't believe there is a right or wrong in terms of who proposes. The last paragraph of the article sums up, in my opinion, why women don't propose:

Most women believe that if they are the first ones thinking about marriage and actually proposing it, that something is wrong in the relationship. However, the same argument could be made the other way. Why do men have to be the ones to propose marriage? Is it because of tradition? Or is it because women believe that men have to be committed first before jumping into marriage? My belief is that most women would not even consider proposing because it would give them the perception that the man is not ready for such a commitment.

Edited: malexander on 31st May, 2005 - 5:42pm

Asks Who

Personally I feel both persons should know the answer will be 'yes' from the beginning, but the man should ask if he is going to be the main provider and the woman intends to become a mother. The reason for this is because the man will have to take on the responsibility to feed himself and two or three others and so he should be prepared to do so. Although if that is not the case then it really does not matter, but from a traditional sense no woman wants to feel like they are 'desperate', 'easy' or 'begging'.