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Depression

I have met many people that seem normal and carry on a normal lifestyle, but within they carry a world of burden. One person once said that if you think that someone has no problems it is because you do not know them. Some may think for instance that the rich do not have any worries, but think for a second.... Does money make you immune from not being able to have children, divorce, a rebellious teen, kidnappers holding your son at random, not having true friends just people that want your money? This may not cause depression in you, but it will for others. Depression usually starts to set in when we begin to compare our troubles with what should have been. The other part of depression comes when you feel unappreciated or no one cares…

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What are your feelings on this?

Depression

I have noticed many times in the news, especially when it about a crime where kids are shooting kids, mothers are drownding their children, employees or ex-employees are shooting fellow or former co-workers, etc., they are often blamed on the person being depressed or suffering from some form of mental problem.  It seems to me that it is becoming more of a crutch to get the person a lesser sentence for what crimes they have done or attempted to do.  But in a few cases, the person was actually suffering from depression or was mentally impaired.  

I suffer from depression and anxiety attacks.  Outside, I may seem happy-go-lucky all the time, but deep inside of me, I carry a lot of burdens and many worries.  I do not feel depressed all the time and I don't have anxiety attacks often.  But I was diagnosed for these conditions back in 1998.  I was under alot of stress and many worries, because at that time, there were many things seeming to feel out of control in my life.  I was also raising my oldest child by myself at that time as well.  There was also many other things too.  But I may talk about them or post about them one day, but I just don't want to get into much of that right now.  I will say that it was a very trying time in my life.  I am also supposed to be taking medication, but I didn't like the way it made me feel.  So, I quit taking my medication and prayed alot for God to give me the strength to meet my problems head on and deal with whatever happens afterwards.  But not once during my past bouts of depression or anxiety attacks, or the ones that I have had in the present, I have never, (and I mean NEVER EVER) did the thought ever cross my mind about hurting myself or someone else.

I believe that if a person is suffering from depression and they are thinking or acting like they are going to cause bodily harm, there are signs that are not hard to see or notice.  Even to not know the person very well or a person that you just meet or talk to in passing, you could still notice something is a little off with that person.

Depression Health & Special Psychology

That's true in some cases but not all of them. Everybody express their emotions in different ways. In the cases in which you know the person may harm himself or others is extremely difficult to know when he/she may decide to do something like that. My uncle (who was like a father to me since he raised me) committed suicide a year ago. Since I was 11 years old he suffer from depression and say he wanted to kill himself. We tried so many times to get him help but nothing really helped, even the law of my country didn't help because if we wanted to put him in a hospital he needed to sign papers in agreement to that and of course that was never going to happen. Anyhow, it took him 17 years to kill himself and I assure it was the most difficult decision he ever did because I knew him so well....so even though a family, friends can see these signs sometimes there is so little you can do to prevent it. and it leave so many people with feelings of guilt and sorrow....

Depression

This is an old topic, but it interests me. I fear that in our time, boys and the men they become are more and more hesitant to share their feelings. I can see many factors playing into this.

First, technology and entertainment have supplanted real communication. The mixed messages of the media are constantly trying to communicate with us, but we generally feel less drive to share our deeper thoughts and feelings than previous generations. To have honest emotions is unfashionable.

Secondly, the women's rights movement has had some great results, but it has also made males much more cautious to share anything. Much of what was once considered male bonding is now called chauvinism, exclusion, or sexual harassment. This is not to say that hazing and bullying are the way to build functional men, but there are far fewer opportunities for boys to get together as 'just us guys' today. Even the Boy Scouts, which is the best we have left, is under attack constantly from groups that say they are sexist, discriminatory, and too religious.

I am not saying that we should go back to the days of segregated schools or anything radical. I am saying that men and boys do not spend enough quality time together, and the definition of manhood is becoming more and more nebulous. Perhaps this is one reason so many men question their sexual identity these days - the older generations have not adequately taught them how to be men.

That leads to another reason for depression and uncertainty among boys - fathers are failing their families. This is a worldwide problem. Single motherhood is always on the rise, and even in homes where a father is present, so many are emotionally and morally absent. If every boy had a concerned, involved, disciplined dad - dad he could trust - a dad to whom he could take questions about anything from body parts to baseball, from long division to the possibility of an afterlife - then depression and violent crime would be nearly obliterated among our boys.

Uncertainty about oneself often leads to nervousness, sadness, anger, and sometimes ultimately clinical depression. Depression is a silent killer, especially in boys, because they often do not feel comfortable to talk about it. The problem only becomes more complicated in the teenage years, and rarely just 'fixes itself.' I am fortunate to have had a good family with a loving father, but I still had some problems of this type in my teenage years. No single solution will fix the problem - we just need a societal paradigm shift regarding who boys really are and what they need.

Depression

I think this statement couldn't be much further from the truth. In fact, the women's rights movement encourages/encouraged men to shared their emotions. In the 1950's, 60's and even 70's no man would ever cry publicly for any reason. Now this isn't the case any longer. Just yesterday, I was watching an Oprah show on TV where several well known actors were moved to tears, publically because of a sad story being discussed.

It is true men will hesitate to share sexist or chauvinistic comments. To me, that is as it should be and if the women's movement had any hand in that, I think it is wonderful. However, the fact that it is now more acceptable for males to be honest about their emotions, treatment for depression among them should be a bit more successful.

Edited: tenaheff on 7th Jan, 2005 - 10:11pm

Depression

Good point, Tenaheff. Perhaps what I have described is more a manifestation of the hypersensitive extremes of anti-male sentiment to which a few individuals subscribe in the name of women's lib. I have witnessed a sentiment from a small number of females I have known to the effect of, "How dare you be sad about anything? We've been through so much more!" This is more of a junior high school-level attitude problem than a widespread epidemic, but because of that general impression, I know I was more stoic around women, while my lack of interest in sports, etc. left me few male friendships. I was only making a conjecture from my own experience.

Sorry if my comment was offensive.

Depression

I wasn't offended, but I just had to disagree.

Anyone who takes the position that someone elses problems or feelings aren't important or relevent because they have been through so much themselves is really out of line. They may be a bit too sensitive themselves and take their insecurities out on others. The problem is, when this happens, we tend to blame the larger target, such as the women's rights movement.

Incidently, I think Boy Scouts should be for boys and girl scouts for boys, so in some areas this has been taken too far. However, in the area where feelings are concerned, I think the fact that men are "allowed" to be sensitive and caring, this is a good thing.

Depression Psychology Special & Health

Breakthrough in Research on Depression Announced

Washington - Scientists have discovered a protein that seems to play a crucial role in developing depression, a finding that may lead to new treatments for the often debilitating illness - and fundamental understanding of why it strikes.
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