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I Cannot Lose - Page 2

Actually I do it and he begs me to play and he apologizes. My point is that I do not think he fully understand how bad is cheating, he would apologize because mommy won't play with him anymore rather than because he was cheating.

Lose I

When I was young I really hated to lose. I would rather not play games than to lose a game. Our family used play games and my parents were trying to figure out how to address my problem. My father decided to make losing a learning opportunity. I remember once when I lost my father asked me if I ever wanted to lose again? Of course, I said no. Then he asked me...Do you know why you lost? I said because you and Mom were better. He told me that that wasn't true, but they did have a better strategy than I did. We talked about the game and when it turned to show the winner. Of course, this only worked with games that are not all luck, but require some sort of strategy. Chess, Monopoly, Risk, Gin Rummy and Checkers were some of my favorite games.

The only thing I would warn against in doing this is that your child may become really good at games and they wont be much fun for you to play!

I Cannot Lose Health & Special Psychology

Winning and losing places an indirect reward system in the child's mind so we do not emphasize who won or who did not with our child because he becomes very emotional if he does not win. The idea is IF you win THEN you are the best best, good, not a loser, and so forth. Conversly IF you do not win THEN you are all the opposite. I have found that even if you teach a child it is not so that the child will still learn it from their interaction with other children.

Actually, playing any kind of game can be an emotional roller coaster if he does not come out the victor, so I honestly avoid playing any kind of games with him unless I am prepared to let him win or will be able to let him (this is not possible when other children are involved like in a class setting).

Page 2 Lose I

I can go with you on that one JB, my Daughter is exactly the same, my youngest Son is also, but not to the extent that my daughter is. It has landed her in a lot of trouble at school, as she always has to be the triumphant victor in everything she does. This is even to the extent of she pushes to be the first in line to go down the stairs, she races to be in her school uniform before her brother. At swimming, she runs down the side of the pool to get to be first in line, and if anyone beats her to it, there are major tantrums, throwing herself on the floor, screaming etc. It's hard also, because people don't understand that it's part of her 'disability', and not that she's just another spoilt kid.

Lose I

That is classic isn't it, because the way they do it does not appear as one who is somehow 'challenged'. Then they (everyone else around) looks at you, the parent, with a look of 'come on you can be a better parent, teach your child, train him'.

I Cannot Lose

That's it JB, so spot on!
The other comment I tend to get if she misses her swimming lesson the week she returns " we missed you last week-it was so quiet!"
It's easy to sit on a perch when you haven't got a child with challenging behavior, but I know for a fact if I wasn't so thick skinned, I'd be hurt by the comments, as it is, I feel pity for the other parents, because they're certainly not instilling patience, understanding or humility in their kids!

I Lose - Page 2

DianeC:

Oh my gosh, that's so hurtful! Children can be very cruel, as parents we try our best to protect Felipe from that type of things but the truth is that you cannot protect your kids all the time from those type of statements.

I Lose Psychology Special & Health - Page 2

That was my fault for not making it clear- that was the parents shouting that out loudly so that everyone could hear!

Sometimes, I think kids are so cruel, because they pick up on sniping from their parents- although not always, sometimes kids do it all by themselves!