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What Not To Talk About

Have you ever been on a date where the person just talks too much or you find that you are the only one speaking most of the time? How do you know when to zip it (your mouth) up and when to not be like 'Silence of the Lambs'? What things should NOT be discussed on a first date?

About Talk To What

I think family problems are a big no no on the first date. I had a date once that started talking about how things where not going well at home and that her dad was verbally abusive and how she thought that he had been spying on her in the shower. While I a fully against human beings like that, I was not wanting to get into a relationship with that much baggage and didn't really want to hear her story. I really just wanted to go home after that and we most certainly didn't date after that first one.

I have however found my self on a date or two in which I was the one talking most of the time. Some times its OK, you really need to be aware of the other person though. My wife wasn't much of a talker and I talked most of the time. She found me insightful, charming, and funny and didn't mind my talking. Lucky for me the drug wore off after I stopped talking!

What Not To Talk About Reviews Consumer & Travel Family Culture

Unfortunately, I have been (at different times) both of these annoying people. I remember in high school I had a date with a guy who was so "cool" that I was absolutely speechless the entire night. Needless to say, it was the last date.

Since then, I think I have learned to converse, rather than monopolize the conversation or just sit and blush -- at least, I have tried to become better at it. (It's difficult when you are an insufferable know-it-all, like I am, but I try. )

Things I avoid discussing during first dates:

Foreign policy
Deep Doctrine
Past relationships
Sex
Money
My kids (aside from how many and how old and how cute )
Future dates

About Talk To What

Past relationships probably would not be the best topic for a first date. It sets a precedence of what the other person is expecting out of this date and/or what kind of people the other person has been with before. Personally, that is information I would like to learn on my own, in time, instead of being told all at once. Also, these types of conversations usually become very emotional, and probably isn't what you and your date should be focusing on for a first date.

About Talk To What

IMO, the biggest warning sign I know of is if a person goes off about their family problems when you are just getting to know them and/or on the first date.

What Not To Talk About

Some of the topics I think is a no no for a first date:

1. Your mom. I mean, is sweet that a man speaks about his mom and all but do not share it on the first date! Specially if she is not the sweet-type.

2. Past relationships. That's a turn off! Specially if you bad talk your ex.

3. ALL your past mistakes. Like if your date is some type of Priest you need to confess to all your "sins".

What To Talk About

I have been the one to talk too much on a date once because my date was so shy! I believe that it is important to observe a person's body language, so you will know when to shut up! Well here are topics that should never be raised on a first date:

1) Don't exclaim "my bunions are killing me!" (no one wants to hear that!)
2) Never grumble and complain about your work day being horrible (nobody likes a whiner).
3) Don't exclaim how expensive the food is at the restaurant (you don't want your date to think that, it has been a long time since you have been out).
4) Never compare your date to your past relationships (this is not a competition, it's just a date).
5) Don't dwell or raise personal matters like an argument you had with your parents or boss (he's your date not your psychiatrist).
6) Don't make future predictions like you are expecting marriage (this will certainly scare your date off).
7) Never raise that you have "commitment issues."
8) Don't criticize everything your date says.
9) Don't be domineering or "mothering" your date (for example, don't exclaim that there is a right way and a wrong way of holding your fork or try to adjust his tie.)
10) Never say "no one understands me" (your date may take this as a hint that you are not likeable).