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Plural & Gay Marriage

Plural & Gay Marriage in Trinidad & Tobago

With the recent capture of Warren Jeffs (covered in another Thread), I decided to ask a devotee Muslim about Plural Marriage (also covered in another Thread). One of the questions I asked him was why did Muslims in T&T not press the government to legalize Plural Marriage if they do it anyway? He could not answer.

Gay Marriage has also been brought up before by the small public Gay Community (I say small, because the ones that speak out is small, but there is a much larger 'silent' movement), but it has been beaten down vigorously.

This Thread is to Discuss these two kinds of Marriage in Trinidad & Tobago only. What are your views?

Marriage Gay and Plural

Okay... I'll attempt to answer your question on Islamic 'plural' marriage.

One of the reasons I think they can't (or won't) attempt to fight for legalization of that status is this: FIrstly, it's not open to everyone and secondly, the educated Muslim Trinidadian woman doesn't want a part of it.

I had discussed this once, with a friend of mine, she's an accountant with a top auditing firm. Her uncle is a wealthy doctor here in Trinidad, with the multiple wives which go with the territory - in order to have more than one, you need to prove that you can afford to take care of the surplus

That state of affairs grosses my friend out, for want of a better word. She said to me, that she cannot even stand to kiss her uncle on the cheek, and prefers to avoid family gatherings when he and his wives would attend.

Therefore, while a woman with less education, who is in a lower socio-economic group might see this as a way to get a better life for herself, the educated woman wants much more than to be wife no. 3 of 7.

Since it is those more educated women who are among the lawyers and policymakers, it would be extremely difficult to get legal status, for that sort of arrangement here in Trinidad.

Of course, my opinion is based on my own experiences and those of my friends, so I'm open to correction!

Plural & Gay Marriage Caribbean / Tobago & Trinidad

Not sure if you see it, but that does not sound very good. Although I can gather what you mean, yet it seems stereotypical to say that. I am not sure Abu Bakr's wives (some of them well educated) would appreciate that. There were actually several factors that I considered to be possible reasons:

1. Islam has its own rule / law / judiciary that is considered apart from the laws of the land and it governs all Muslims. In Islam this is considered first and the laws of government secondary. Therefore if one is married under Islam the other is just formality. In essence this is true for many things especially the fact that there is not much difference between me having affairs with three women, living with three women and married to three women. The only difference being that in one the government recognizes it, but if the the government is secondary then 'who cares' to put it plain.

2. The other reason is the burden that can come from divorce or settlements. It is actually convenient for the man to not have to bring the government within his marriage, if he can do without the government's nose in his business then all the better. This is actually covered more in the Culture and Traditions Board, but wanted to mention it here as a possible reason.

Marriage Gay and Plural

Trinichic, so in few words....are you saying that only low-income, uneducated women are part or would be part of this type of marriages? If so, where do you get that idea from?

Edited: LDS_forever on 28th Sep, 2006 - 8:15pm

Marriage Gay and Plural

I think Trinidad is too conservative and homophobic a society for gay marriage to be legalised here. And I don't really see that changing soon. I think in the near future, it would only really take place in the West.

Plural & Gay Marriage

I agree with what somebody said earlier. Many men have 'outside' women and this is called 'macho'. These affairs/relationships are 'marriages' that have taken place. If a man wants to legalize his affairs with marriage then I do not see the problem. I for one will not be having more than one wife, yes I see the benefits (especially in the bedroom) but I also see the many downs that go with it. To me the disadvantages outweigh the benefits. Sorry not worth my time. As for the gay marriages, I am sure that will not happen here soon. Maybe in my lifetime, who knows but when it does, we will have other people wanting other types of marriages to be legalized. Some will want to marry their pets, those pedos will love to marry children, some men will marry their car. Think I am kidding? I thought people were kidding in the 80's when I first heard of the gay marriages. Goes to show you that people will never stop to amaze you with their ideas.

by the way Trinichic one of Abu Baker's wife is a lawyer who represents him on his cases, so even the educated ones follow this tradition. Maybe your educated Muslim friends are not true practicing Muslims, what you think?

Edited: lordryoko on 10th Sep, 2008 - 3:32am

Plural & Gay Marriage

How can a person have a love relationship with a car?

I notice that Trinidad is quite a homophobic society, and I guess it's not something I'm used to. I used to live in UK and while some people didn't like it I guess most people didn't really care. When Tony Blair was PM, there was an openly gay member of his Cabinet and people didn't really care. I don't know if it would be the same if there were an openly gay member of Manning's Cabinet.

Plural & Gay Marriage Trinidad & Tobago / Caribbean

Love relationship with cars? Have you seen some men with their cars? I mean I don't think people have 'relations' with their cars but I tell you a lot of men treat their cars better than their women. I actually heard a man tell his wife to don't dare 'effing' vomit in the car. He was carrying her to the hospital and was angry because the ambulance couldn't come so he was 'forced' to carry her in his car to the hospital. His own wife eh...

Oh I don't think we are homophobic it's just that a lot of us still think that gay relations are nasty and outright 'stink'. So its not fear but more disgust really.

Edited: lordryoko on 26th Sep, 2008 - 6:56am