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Punishment.  Which form is best?

I have been thinking about what is the best way to disipline my kids.  It is mainly dealing with my oldest child.  Here lately she has really been acting out and being hateful towards my baby, my husband, and everyone else around her.  I have tried grounding her, but it doesn't work.  She seems to act out more because she can't do something she likes or watch cartoons.  I have tried time-outs, standing in a corner, and taking her favorite things and putting them up for a while. I am trying to find an alternative to keep from spanking.  I spanked my oldest daughter once, and I felt horrible about it afterwards.

So, please if someone has any advice for punishments that might work or help, I would greatly appreciate it.  Thanks.  

best form nbspWhich Punishment

Hmmm, it is difficult, but I am glad you have not resorted to spanking yet. I do want to ask this....

1. Have you sat down with her privately and expressed your love for her?
2. Do you do things together? Just you and her without anyone else?
3. Do you tell her how much you appreciate her 'help' when she does something?

Punishment.  Which form is best? Reviews Consumer & Travel Family Culture

We talked about it on the chat room and we know that she may be feeling jealous and overwhelmed because of all the changes she went through, first being alone with you, now seeing you married and with another kid. It's a lot for her and maybe you all are expecting too much from her. Plus you work full time. So it's a lot for her lil heart and mind. Try spending quality time with her, only the two of you, rather than looking for punishments, try to see what is really bothering her. Remember, she's the child, you are the adult.
Assure her how much you love her and your expectations of her, let her express you how she feels, let her open herself,. once she learns she can talk to you and express her feelings, she will stop acting up as a way to call your attention, the reason she's doing it it's because maybe she's not getting the attention she needs from you and the only way she seems to think it will work, it's when she behaves bad.
Compliment her in the lil things, children love praises. She will do better under praises than under critisism.  Just like you said your youngest daughter sometimes just cry for comfort, the oldest one is asking for the same thing but in another way but asking the exactly same thing!. Just love her mss, love her more when she's less lovable I know it's hard, I deal with it every day. Don't wish that she can do this or she could not do that, just adapt on how she is and move on from there. All kids need discipline but when the child is under special circumnstances like yours, she needs the extra love, the extra care that only her mom can provide. If she's mean to someone, turn the bad experience in something you can teach. Tell her to write or say 10 things she loves the most about that person, she will learn to appreciate others and see there are nice things about other people
Hope it helps

best form nbspWhich Punishment

Well, we are trying to use the 'reward' system for when she's good.  She gets to play a video game on the playstation for an hour is she is really good all day long.  Now, if she has a little problem during the day, she only gets to play for 30 minutes.  Now if she is really misbehaved, she doesn't even get to watch tv or even look at the playstation.  This system seems to be working for the moment.  I am also taking a day once a week for me and my oldest daughter to spend the evening together.  Right now, it's just grocery shopping, but at least it does get her away from the house with just me for a little while.

best form nbspWhich Punishment

Wow, that's great Mss, I'm glad for you . Hope it will work just fine with her just remember, hugging her, kissing her and tell her how much you love her, even when she's all crancky and moody ;D

Punishment.  Which form is best?

Oh, I wouldn't forget to do that.  ;)  I have also been spending a little more time working with her on her numbers, letters, and her writing.  So she can be ready for school to start up again next month.  She really loves school, when it can keep her attention long enough.  Her behavior is a little better when she was in school too.

Punishment.  Which form best

I think that we have finally found a positive way to get Sylvanna to act better.  We have started like this sticker board thing.  Everytime she does something good, we put a sticker on the chart.  When she misbehaves, she doesn't get a sticker.  When she gets enough stickers on her chart, she gets to pick a special activity that she likes to do.  Like going to the animal park, or going to the fair when it is in town, or going to see a movie.

Punishment.  Which form best Culture Family Travel & Consumer Reviews

That sounds like a good idea. We already have a shorter version of that with Felipe. If he does 'x' then he gets 'y', sometimes he disagrees and so we say no 'y' to him and then he quickly runs and does 'x'