Name: Susan
Comments: I am in a relationship with a spectacular man with a great career and who comes out of a good family. We have been living together for 1 month already and I think I have developed very strong feelings for him. The only problem that haunts me is the fact that he is still in love with his ex. She moved overseas about a year ago but he is still crazy about her. He wants to try something with her as soon as she returns, apparently in 3 months time. He made it clear that that is what he wants but yet he watches me while I'm sleeping or surprises me with flowers and gifts. He is loving and caring and we are living together like a married couple. I want him so badly and I think I'm in love with him. Please help!
I truly don't understand. You are living together but this man is in love with someone else AND plans to get back with her? Knowing this, what are you doing there still as you read this? You need to wake up before this dream is all over in 3 months time. Sorry.
I do not understand why you would move in with someone who is still in love with somebody else and has intentions of trying to make it work with her still. You are just being used as a fill-in. You deserve more than that. You should have more self-respect and belief that unless a man is willing to put you first he can take a hike. Flowers and gifts are an age-old ploy that men have used to have their way with women. You are setting yourself up for a lot of pain and disappointment. This man is not committed to you if he is still having hopes for a future with his ex. You can play house all you want but it is still just an illusion of a real relationship. If you really care about this man and hope to have a future with him, you should move out now and tell him to call you when he's over the other woman. If he calls, then you can start to build a solid relationship (slowly) without ghosts from the past. Until then you are fooling yourself.
You need to get out of this relationship as soon as possible. If this man has feelings for someone else, he is only using you to fulfill his emotional needs while he waits for the woman he wants.
If you are looking for a serious relationship, you need to move on from this and start looking for someone who only has eyes for you. If you really love this man, you will let him go and you can let him know that you will be there when he is ready for you to be the only woman for him.