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What you would do if you cannot have children?

If you know you cannot have children, would you do a special treatment and try to conceive or you would rather to respect nature and adopt a child and why?

children have you if would What

I would try everything in the world to have one but if it is imposible then I would adopt a child.

What you would do if you cannot have children? Reviews Consumer & Travel Family Culture

I would get medical help - there have been great advances in medicine, so there must be something that could be done to help me concieve.  If that doesn't work, then I guess that I would have to live without children of my own, because adoption is not an option for me.

children have you if would What

why adoption is not an option for you? There are so many kids who need a loving mother to take care of them...

children have you if would What

Adoption is not an option for me because, and you may call me selfish here, I just can't see myself raising someone else's child.  This may be because I think it would be a constant reminder that I couldn't have one of my own.  I know that there are lots of children who need a loving mother, but I don't think that I could be that person.  I'm not saying that if I had an adopted child that I would illtreat him/her, I would never do that!  I had an ex who had a son...... wonderful child, and we had a great time together.  He still calls me and we chat on the phone (the child I mean).  In addition, I interact with children every day and love them immensely, but if I can't have one of my own, I would prefer not to adopt, because, as I said, it would be a constant reminder of my failure.
 
I know what you're going to say..... it's not about me, it's about giving a child a loving home etc. etc.  But I heard somewhere that you can't love someone else, If you don't love yourself.  If I see inadequacies in myself in this regard, and if I am constantly thinking about my inability, then how on earth can I love this child?  

Please help me here, because I know that I really shouldn't be feeling this way.  I know that I should be able to put that deficiency behind me and move on, but I just don't know how I would do that if I were in that situation.

What you would do if you cannot have children?

Uhhhhh.... being male.... I wonder if I can post here without getting a 'speech'

Anyway, if my wife could not become pregnant I think we would opt for adoption.

QUOTE

Adoption is not an option for me because, and you may call me selfish here, I just can't see myself raising someone else's child.

Just to comment... I have met many people with the same view, so you are not alone. I would say that if you think of it as helping your 'brother' or 'sister' rather than someone's child. The other point to consider... if you were abandoned by your parnets wouldn't you hope for someone (like yourself maybe) that would raise you, give you love and care?

What would if you have children

Marina, I think the key here is for you to understand that if you cannot have children is NOT your failure, God (in his wisdom) chose it that way, sometimes we don't know the answers for everything but believe me He has a reason for everything.  :)
You need to be a bit more open about it not only because you don't know what the future will bring but also because for your own good. There are people who are afraid to adopt because they are afraid to love...even though, you may not see it that way, there are plenty people out there with the same issue.  If you're blessed enough to have a son/daughter of your own and something happen to you, would you like that a loving person take care of them as you did when you was alive? how would you feel if there is NOBODY to take care of your children just because they feel they cannot do it because it will be a reminder of their 'failure' to not have their own children. Think about...sometimes we  tend to think about ourselves so much than we lose so many opportunities to serve and love others who are MORE in need than us. I don't know your religion background but I consider myself as a religious person and I know that God will feel so please to know that a loving person will be able to raise a child even though is not hers.
Also Marina,  God gives us a lot of challenges in life...we can't just run away from them, we have to deal with them, no matter what...that's part of our living process here on Earth. Even though I don't know what God has planned for you, it would be good if you re- considered that, He's listening to you and He knows how you feel...now it may seems to you that you're  just giving your comment or opinion, but  he's listening...and if for some reason, this thread come true (HOPE NOT!)  in your life, would you still thinking the same way?
I know you have so much love to give....if you just allow yourself to feel....to be loved and loved...then, you will not have problems to share your life with a little one less affortunate who can give you not only love but great moments that you will treasure for ever....
If you choose not to adopt...you will live your life without any hopes, just watching how other people enjoy their lives with their kids and you don't...and you know what will be the worst thing? The fact that may be you would wonder...'What would happen if I could to adopt...' and may be will be too late...
Hope my words can help you a bit....
Best wishes!
All my love,
LDS_forever  :)

What would if you have children Culture Family Travel & Consumer Reviews

Thank you, LDS, and I understand fully what you are saying.  You're quite right.... I never thought about having someone else take care of my children...... I guess I would want them to love and take care of my children if I wasn't around to do it.  It really does look different from that point of view.  But I'm not agreeing with you because I would want someone to do me a favour if I die, I'm agreeing with you because your argument really touched me, and it shouldn't be about if the child is mine or not biologically, it should be about what I can do in my little way to make that child's life better.  Another thing, I really do have lots of love to give....and God really does work in mysterious ways.   I genuinely love children, so  to answer that question again..... If I couldn't have children of my own, I would definitely adopt one.  Thanks again LDS.... you're a really special person!