A Police Officer Pulls You Over
"I'll have to report you, sir, " said the traffic cop to the speeding driver.
"You were doing 85 miles an hour. "
"Nonsense, officer, " declared the driver. "I've only been in the car for ten minutes. "
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"Now as I understand it, Sir, " said the police officer to the motorist, "you were driving this vehicle when the accident occurred. Can you tell me what happened?"
"I'm afraid not, officer, " replied the motorist. "I had my eyes shut!"
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"When I saw you driving down the road, I guessed 55 at least. "
"You're wrong, officer, it's only my hat that makes me look that old. "
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An Arkansas State trooper pulls over a pickup truck on I-40 and says to the driver, "Got any ID?" The driver says, "'Bout what?"
A state trooper pulls over a car on I 35 south. As he is walking up to the car he notices there are all kinds of knives in the back seat. Being a little apprehensive he cautiously asks the driver for his license, registration and proof of insurance. The driver hands over the information. The trooper asks the guy about the knives. The driver explains that he is a traveling knife juggler and asks the trooper if he could show him to prove it. The trooper agrees. The driver gets out and begins juggling three knives...then four...then five.... then six at once. About this time two truckers drive by. The first trucker radios the second and asks if he saw that. The second trucker says yeah. The first trucker says, " I am glad I am sober those field sobriety test looks to be a real hassle now."