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Let Her Cry Or Pick Her Up

Let Her Cry or Pick Her Up

If a baby is cranky and you have done everything you know of to get her to sleep (and she has no medical problems) do you eventually let her cry or pick her up each time?

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I know there are some doctors that think that you should let the baby cry until he/she learns to fall asleep on her own, I personally would not do it. You can call me "weak" if you want to but as a mother when I see my little one crying, I cannot just ignore him. So basically yes, I would probably pick him up each time he cries.

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I tend to go by the 5 minute rule, that is, that I tend to try to leave them to go off to sleep naturally, but I keep an eye on them without them knowing my presence to be there. If after 5 minutes they are still crying, I go to pick them up. 9 times out of 10, they tend to be asleep before the 5 minutes are up.

As a general, kids are very good at testing and pushing barriers, and having their parents run ragged, interestingly, the 2 boys who I am a Nanny to, when I babysit for them, I put them down for their nights sleep at 7.30 pm, and they go straight off to sleep for me, yet when their Mum puts them down for the night, they play her up, and she ends up bringing them down until around 11.30 pm, thus she is tired all the time.

I find that if you are consistent with it, kids just tend to accept it as routine, and will eventually get into a good routine and sleep pattern.

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Thanks for the suggestions DianeC, what I realized today with Jonah is that sometimes he cries while he still asleep so I left him for some minutes and he fall back to sleep, but if the cries goes for too long then it means he is up and he wants to eat.

Up Pick Cry Let

Hi LDS, Each child is different, but you normally find that if after 5 minutes they are still crying, chances are they are just not going to settle off, and you don't have much choice other than to get them up, but as I said earlier, I find most of the time, they'll be asleep before 5 minutes are out. Be careful though, if they see you, they'll want to be picked up immediately whether they need to or not!

People laugh at how firm I am on this, considering how I'm so soft in all other ways, but I've found out the hard way, that it's the best policy.

As your baby gets into routine though, you get to know the difference of when there is something genuinely wrong with them, and when they are having you on. *laughs*

Let Her Cry Or Pick Her Up

I'm also hard-pressed to let a baby cry! When they are so little, it creates a bond of trust. Yes, when they get older they try to manipulate you, but before 5 or 6 months old, I think they truly have needs that must be met immediately. Then, when they get a bit older they have that established feeling that "mommy will be here soon" when they have a true need. I think the 5-minute Rule for the older kids is a good one, DianeC.

Let Cry Pick Up

I agree with you, Farseer, though I haven't had the experience I have heard the same thing from others and it makes sense. When the baby is so small that they really can't be throwing a tantrum or trying to manipulate, etc, then not picking them up when they cry could be damaging. But if your 2 or 3 year old is crying because he doesn't want to go to bed or he knows if he cries mommy will let him do what he wants, that is the time to wait it out - the five-minute rule, which sounds like a great idea.