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Dealing With Bullies

Do you have problems, ever had concerns or have children that suffered from bullying? How do you deal with it? How do you encourage others to deal with it? Is it possible to maintain an academic standard while being abused in this way?

Bullies Dealing

I am sure all of us have gone through this at one time or the other, and I have found in my own experience that giving in to their aggressive requests only causes things to get worst. I have seen others who have done this and they were plagued more and more until they would not even attend school or shied away in general.

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I do not think the counsel of some parents of "don't listen to what they say" works at all. I think it makes matters even worst because the child is perceived as weak and internally is developing a lot of anger and aggression that ends up taking a gun and going to the school and shooting everybody. Bullies are weak individuals who take advantage of people who are not in position of defending themselves. If the individual in question (who is being abused) develops a character that will allow him to show self-confidence, I think the bullying may stop at some point of time.

I think parents should take VERY seriously when the children share with them these kind of experiences. Some parents may think it is not a big deal but it is not only a big deal for the child but in a lot of cases have demonstrated that if it is not deal properly, tragic occurrences may take place.

Bullies Dealing

Schools facing gang challenge

Teachers are witnessing an increase in gang-related activity in schools, according to research.
Ref. https://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/education/7352977.stm

Bullies Dealing

Bullys are only compensating for their own low self esteem. The best way to deal with bullies is to stand up to them.

Now the article was about a "gang" of girls surrounding one girl at a time. This can only be dealt with LEGALLY. The children being assaulted need to report it to the administration of their schools AND to the police. Remember "assault" does not mean being hit, it means being threatened with damage.

My daughter had to deal with a bully on her school bus. For 8 years she put up with it then she decided rather than throwing him through the bus window, she's just stop riding the bus and I drove her to school for the last three years. It might be wrong but I told her that if she ever walked past his locker, that she should randomly, some day, just reach out and shove him into it. She, sensibly, never did it.

My daughter is not a bully, but she is a very confident young lady and about 1/3 of her school was "afraid" of her! It was well known she was a pagan and for those who bothered her she "played up" their ignorance about Wicca. She actually had one girl convinced that Ashley could turn her into a toad! Stupid girl. It kept this girl and her whole cliche out of Ashley's hair for four years, though.

Actually my daughter was very popular in school. Her confidence and refusal to join any cliches (except being a "Band Nerd") helped her make friends. She also would go out of her way to befriend people who seemed not to have a lot of friends. This is also one of the things that kept the bullies off her. Bullies do not usually confront people who can pull any six people out of a crowd to stand with them.

Dealing With Bullies

Bullies in school This is something that every child has to deal with in one way or another. My eldest son dealy with his bully by throwing a diskus at him during track. Since then no other kid has dared to try to bully him. I think half the school is afraid of him. He has been working out since he was 14 and now he is getting enough strength up to almost challenge me. I know I scare kids at school because my daughters tell me that kids think I am a beast. I have never threatened any kids.

My middle son is still trying to deal with his bully, a girl, I have told him to stay away from her but he keeps going back to her like a puppy on a leash. My wife and I have no idea on how to make him see the light. She has even accused him of sexual harassment. But they keep going back to each other. I have talked to her mother who works at the school but still they hang out together and he keeps ending up on the losing end. At least with extensive talks with her mother, me and the school officials that next time anything that is brought up concerning them they both are expelled. So far we have not heard anything this year.

Dealing Bullies

Schools may be sued over bullies

Schools have been warned that they run a "real risk" of being sued if they are slack in dealing with bullying. Ref. Source 6

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Dealing with a bully at one point or another is an inevitability. I find doing nothing is not a good choice. Giving a mean look like, "You don't want to mess with me.", goes a long way. Also saying something in an easy tone to the bully such as, "I am not impressed.", or something along these lines helps. Though you may suffer some consequence from standing up, it is usually worth it considering the alternative. I find bullies usually retaliate in subversive ways and not directly if you stand up to them.

Another question I ask myself is when do you step in when you see bullying. Obviously you may not know the entire story so right off I usually don't do anything. If I see it occurring over and over I try to step in, works most of the time.

Suing a school over a bully seems a bit extreme unless multiple parents are involved, because many kids are being bullied by that one kid. More so I would say suing the parent would be more along the right line. Schools already have so much on their plates, suing them will take away money the school needs to function. Taking more money away from the school is only going to make the problem worse I think.

Edited: Oliron on 30th Apr, 2010 - 10:42pm