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Are People Born Gay Or Gay By Choice? - Page 12

Honey, looks like you will be needing the Mature section if you go any deeper.

Choice Gay Gay Born People Are

This is one of my first posts and I am so going to get slaughtered for this but what the hell.

I"m sorry but I am going to state the "Moral Standards" because that is how people determine opinions and you can't just wave it away that easy.

Because I believe in God (yes the Christian one AKA Jehovah) there are no questions ask. Being gay is just another sin like adultery, stealing, lying etc. As offensive as this sounds it is just something that I have to take as a fact if I am to be a Christian. I am not homophobic and I know some people who are gay and some who use to be (Some gays do get converted if you believe it or not). Therefore it is definitely a choice.

I agree with this entirely and I also roll my eyes when I get lectured about Christian Morals when I have sinned however these rules can't just be wiped away by some sort of fashion type socialistic thinking. Our religion is not outdated!

Please feel free to slaughter the hell out of this reply as I am still young and there is definitely plenty of meat to go around in this argument.

Message Edited... I had to erase your Bible verses since this is the Psychology board and NOT the Religious board. Make a search and you will find several threads about Gays on a religious perspective.

Edited: LDS_forever on 5th Dec, 2006 - 3:22pm

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I have seen this Discussion go on for a bit now, but my instinct tells me that one cannot be born gay just as one cannot be born an artist. I really believe that it has a lot to do with things told / experienced during growing up years. A good analogy of this would be the following. If a male were born into a colony of only women, would he be gay or is it possible for him to be gay?

Page 12 Choice Gay Gay Born People Are

In my opinion, I think that being gay is definitely a choice. Of course, many people would say that it is fate or the genes in a person that will determine his/her sexual attractions. However, I have been taught that a predestined route can be changed if you wish it to. I think it's all about how the person feels. As human beings, most of the times, we are unable to control or suppress our own emotions unless we are well-practiced at controlling them. So, these people who are termed gay are just people who have decided not to suppress any kinds of emotions they might have that is wrong in the view of society. They have simply chosen to love a man instead of a woman (same with a female loving a female). Personally, I do not think that there is anything wrong with being a gay or lesbian and I do have friends who are like that. We're pretty close friends and I'm quite sure she does not have any childhood traumas or any kind of terrifying experience as a young child. She don't seem to have any kinds of problem relating to other male friends we have also, so I would think that she has just made a choice, instead of being born like that.

About the discussion that the environment we live in affects the development of possible gays and lesbians, I would agree with it in a way. I'm brought up in a pretty conservative family and my parents always told me, ever since young, to not stay too close to guys. I'm not a lesbian but perhaps with the way I was brought up with, I'm now quite uncomfortable with talking with guys. I can't be myself when I'm with them and I don't seem to be able to converse properly with them. I'm sure that there are people out there who have the same problem as me, but in a more serious way. These people perhaps turn to a relationship with a person of the same gender as they feel more at ease with them.

Choice Gay Gay Born People Are

*sets bible aside*

Are gays born gay I would say not all but some I am sure are born with the tendency. I knew a boy growing up real nice kid but was every ounce a girl in every thing he did. I think boys are in general aggressive and rough in play but have kind sweet hearts. Nature's way of getting us "providers from the old cave man days ready to hunt". This lad was just the opposite he today has a wife and kids but I ponder if being gay was acceptable back then, would his life have been different.

Some men are conned into the life style or life events turn them towards it. My brother-in law was gay for a few years after a real bad boy/girl relationship. He sought a councilor and once the scares from the relations were healed he realised the man/man relations he was in were just pure lust and now is dating girls again.

I read a study on rats once where they placed rats in a small room and provided loads of food all was fine even when space was limited. They then kept the rat population even, removing boy/girl rats equal portion to keep the population even and started reducing the food in the room.

Rats started fighting more and became more territorial. After a bit it was noted that the male rats started have relations and the rats also started killing each other in the fights that broke out. I found that interesting especially when one compare rural to city life. rural not extreme isolated communities ok as that cause issues of its own.

I am not homophobic but nor do I think being gay is normal or something I want my children to condone. I have friends that are gay male and female. My boy asked me why they live that way and I told him to ask them as I do not know the answer.

Are People Born Gay Or Gay By Choice?

LiquidOcelot, I too fear my views will cause me to get "slaughtered", or meet with disapproval from the powers that be, but here goes.

All people in a sense are born bi-sexual. By that I mean anyone, depending on the complex interaction of family history, personality components and maybe even biology could at least function bi-sexual, but, due to the instict to reproduce and the socio-moral aspects of our upbringing (and society's attitudes which we introject from and early age) the vast majority of people are primarily heterosexual.

Also, there are different dynamics for males and females. Yes, this sounds very Freudian but in my opinion Freud has been dissed too much by our politically correct society. Just because his views tend to grind hard against certain feministic views or even some religious attitudes, that does not mean the majority of his opinions are incorrect.

Males who grow up with an abusive and or dominant mother and a passive father (or absent), may be more inclined to be drawn to homosexuality in an attempt to connect with the father they never had (real or in essence). Now if you combine this with a genetic predisposition towards novelty (perhaps the type T personality theory applies here) and an abscence of a religious and societal prohibition the chances greatly increase for experimentation and adoption of homosexuality. While this means the person is not born gay they do have a hard wiring that may be difficult to distinquish from this being genetic due to the complex formation of the individual that takes place early in life.

As for females, the male and the female both are attracted physically and emotionally to the mother while they are very young. The male tends to then project these feelings onto a substitute mother image (his wife) when deep in his sub-conscious he realizes that he cannot have his mother. He identifies with the father to get a mother. Thje woman on the other hand never completely breaks this early bond, which creates an interesting dynamic of a love and hate relationship with their mother (often expressing itself in family gatherings when she reaches adulthood). She too realizes she cannot have the mother when very young and so she introjects those attributes of her mother in an attempt to marry her father (in a figurative sence). Most women follow this imperitive and also biology propells them to seek out the male.

However, with women various studies show that women who identify as heterosexual are physically stimulated by imagery of other women. The majority of heterosexual women (if exposed to pornography depicting women having sex with one another) are as physically stimulated as if they view heterosexuals doing the same thing. Now in today's society it's trendy for young women to identify themselves as "bi" (often fully supported by their husbands, boyfriends and the media industry, including porn) and experimentation is probably higher today than ever before. Most of these young women (even if they get romantically involved with a female) will eventually be heterosexual.

Society seems now to praise bisexuality in women. And traditionally women (even in a western religious context) have never been condemned very harshly for same-sex behavior. So seeing our society's de-emphasis of sex for reproduction, basic female psychology and physiology and the like it is no wonder that many women are trying out same-sex relations. Are women today genetically different than 4000 years ago? No. So saying some people are born to be lesbian is wrong since it seems more situational than biological (also we have to establish what is and isn't lesbianism or bi-sexuality since if you say that sexual attraction to the same sex makes you gay or bi then I'd say that would mean the majority of women are at least bi as adults).

For men I think society also plays a part in repression of same sex behavior. I remember a study that involved giving men fake alcohol and telling them it was real. They then had to view gay male porn. The men showed no physical reaction to it when they were sober but when they thought they were drunk they did show reactions. So when they were "drunk" they thought they were not accountable.

Are People Born Gay Gay Choice - Page 12

People can't even accuse people of choosing to be gay. If people "chose" to be gay, they are "choosing" to be hated and looked down upon.

It's genetic. Hands down.

Are People Born Gay Gay Choice Culture Family Travel & Consumer Reviews - Page 12

Well, I am a gay man and I can tell you from the beginning it was certainly not a choice. It is a part of me and always will be. Telling me I can turn straight if I really really want to and if I really really try hard is as nonsensical a statement as my telling a straight person if you try really really hard and really really want it you can turn gay. How many straight men and women out there can turn their sexuality at the drop of hat? I'd argue very few (if any) and the same applies to gay men and women.

I did not have a horrible childhood, I was not raped or abused or corrupted. I am not feminine nor do I want to become trans-gendered. I was not "feminised" during adolescence. I didn't form "unhealthy attachments" with either parent. My sexuality simply developed-as it develops in everyone-through the process of puberty.

So, here I am, with a partner of the same sex, having just celebrated our five year anniversary and our life together is the same cycle of comfortable habit with occasional blip of excitement as everyone else.