Death is inevitable but still it is morbid to dwell in thoughts of it. I have not given it much thoughts but when I was young, I felt so sure that I will be given my full "three score and ten years". That make sit 70, and hey, I have many more years to go! But now, I'm not so sure of that ..... a little ache here, a little pain there and I go thinking, geez, is it the big C or am I having some heart problems, etc.?
Anyway, I think we should try and find that little thing that will spark the 'life' in our life, instead of just living day to day. Like they say, instead of just living, have a life! This article is inspiring how the sweet lady found that spark in her life when she was all ready to go!
https://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/3155501.stm
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Anyway, I think we should try and find that little thing that will spark the 'life' in our life, instead of just living day to day. Like they say, instead of just living, have a life! This article is inspiring how the sweet lady found that spark in her life when she was all ready to go! |
I think that if I die then it was my time to go I have fullfilled my purpose but I think I am a long way from that, and still need time and experience before I can make a difference. Somtimes I think i'm just one person what do I matter in the big scheme of things who really would care or miss me if I died, or have I really touched anyone. Kind of the idea of "it's a wonderful life" the movie. I also worry about war, if they open the draft what will I do, it is one thing to lose your life but to take the life of someone else, what gives me the right to decide who lives or dies?
This thread isn't really about if you want to die or not, this is about if you are prepared. This has to do with your own 'peace' with self more than if it is something you want to have happen. Death is usually associated with spirituallity, thus the question could be, 'Are you spiritually ready for death?' In this way the question deserves more thought and expression.
No, first I need to find people I can trust to take care of my cats and give them the love and care that I do. Then I am ready for death. My doctors all know I am a suicide waiting to happen. Its only been my cats that have kept me from killing myself in the past five years. I have a number of suicide plans, and I have to lie every time my psychiatrist or therapist asks me if I'll call the emergency room if I feel like I'm going to hurt myself. I have no particular attachment to life other than my cats.
Jeff, what is there in the cats that make you want to live?. I read your message and my heart started pumping faster. My dear uncle (who was like a father to me since he raised me) suffered long years of depression, he had several suicide plans and tried to take away his life several times, he did it a year and 7 months ago and I still dealing with the pain, not to mention my grandmother (his mom) who found him. Jeff, I hope we may be able to chat more about this issue because when my uncle died, I promised myself that I will not allow anybody who suffered like my uncle did, committed the same mistake he did.
Please, talk to your therapist...what's the reason of going there is you're not allowing him to do his job and you're not being honest with yourself and with him?. Listen, I have done therapy in the past and it helped me so much but the wounds of knowing that somebody you love commited suicide are wounds that will last forever.
There is so much to live for, I read a lot of your posts and you sound like a very knowledgable person to talk to, if you wanna chat about it, let me know. I don't know you, I know that, but I sinceraly want to see you happy and I want to help in any way I can. Lots of hugs!
LDS_forever