Cries For Help?

Cries Help - Psychology, Special Needs, Health - Posted: 14th Jan, 2005 - 7:30am

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People sometimes do things not for the reason you think, it just may be 'cries for help'.
17th Feb, 2004 - 2:01pm / Post ID: #

Cries For Help?

People sometimes do things not for the reason you think, it just may be 'cries for help'. For instance if someone has multiple relationships, or dates only older men, etc. Do you know someone that does something that you think is really a cry for help? If so, tell us about it and say if you plan to help them.



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22nd May, 2004 - 12:53pm / Post ID: #

Help Cries

I know this girl who I believe is in an abusive relationship. All her past relationships were a failure and the guys ended up cheating on her, even with her closest of friends. She is with a guy right now but based on what she says the guy seems not a person to be trusted. I tried to counsel her but she goes back to the same old thing, she looks and acts like a victim.



Post Date: 28th Nov, 2004 - 12:10am / Post ID: #

Cries For Help?
A Friend

Cries For Help? Health & Special Psychology

I worked with several girls this past Summer who had been abused, both physically and sexually, and some of them had never told anybody any of it until this Summer. In younger people it's sometimes easy to see that something isn't right. When a child is really withdrawn and never seems happy, it's a good sign that they have been mistreated.

One girl, in particular had bee sexually assaulted by her step-dad just weeks before coming to camp. She was nine years old, and at the beginning of the week she was very withdrawn. She never smiled, and she wouldn't talk to anybody. The more the week progressed, she began to open up a bit more to her cabin mates and to me, but she was also a big disciplinary issue in our cabin. On our second to last day, she went into her sister's cabin and was talking to somebody about being abused, and then word started to spread. One of my girls came to get me, and I went and found her. She opened up to me and another counselor, telling us all this stuff that had happened weeks before coming to camp.

When she told us this stuff, so much seemed to click in place. How she was always terrified of the dark. We had to get a nightlight so she wouldn't be in hysterics at night. She was also very "snuggly" for lack of a better term. She had to sit next to me in chapel every night, and she'd just wrap her arms around me and listen to the preacher.

Letting her go was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I wanted to adopt her myself. She'd changed so much by the end of the week. I had led her to Christ the first night we were there, and by the end of the week she was running around laughing like a normal child.

There are definately warning signs that somebody is in a bad situation. I think it's a matter of not only recognizing those signs, but deciding whether we want to put our life and our plans on hold to be sensitive to it.

Post Date: 14th Jan, 2005 - 7:30am / Post ID: #

Cries For Help?
A Friend

Help Cries

I am adopted and had 2 adopted brothers. 1 of them was killed when he was 24 and I was 19, so I have 1 brother left. He lives in Florida. He was married, had 2 children, and then divorced. This is a lot to lose, and he has never really dealt with the grief and the loss from what I can tell. He has strong issues with his adoption and, like me, has abuse issues, in all its different forms. He has chosen for the last 10 years to drown his feelings in alcohol and illegal drugs. He is so far in denial that he thinks he has no issues to deal with and that he is just living his life the way he wants to live it. When I have visited before, he started drinking from the time he woke up until the time he went to bed. He gets a very large cup, probably about 36 ounces, and fills it up in the morning and keeps it full all day long. Then, he will take pills that he has either gotten from a family member on his ex-wife's side of the family who he takes advantage of, or he will buy it anywhere with no regard whatsoever as to where he goes. He does not regard his safety, and though he is a little better about taking care of his children, they witness this daily drowning of pain. I also know that his lifestyle in other area's is not the safest either.

I have fantasized so many times about flying down to Florida and being everything that he needs, for a period of time, and "rescuing" him from his problems. I have so desperately wanted to help him and show him some of what I have learned that has helped me with those same issues. I so want to just gently take his hand and hug him and tell him everything is going to be alright. I want to remove all intoxicating substances from his house and take him to a treatment center before he dies from his self-abuse. He has been in the hospital a lot lately and his health had suffered and gone down hill. It is such a helpless feeling to finally understand and try to accept that I cannot rescue him, he has to want and ask to be rescued. I understand how he feels and I know if he believed and had hope that there was good and happiness without all of those chemicals waiting for him he would want nothing more than to recover and heal, physically, spiritually, mentally, and emotionally. To hound him or to offer help to someone who is not ready for it like my brother, even with the best of intentions, can pressure a person enough that they might not to even try for fear of failure. Or maybe they don't have a desire to get well.

I used to judge my brother when I was much younger for choosing the ways he did to deal with issues in his heart and mind. I am ashamed to admit that I felt like I was better than him for trying to improve myself in what I judged was a constructive way. Along with much repentance, I now see my brother in a different light. Hopefully, with spiritual eyes like that of my Heavenly Father, I see and appreciate the great potential within him and recognize him for what efforts he has made all of his life to overcome the effects of his youth, and also acknowledging him as Heavenly Father's son with divine qualities and potential. I look forward to helping him, if he would allow me to, but that can only happen when he is ready to ask for help.

Reconcile Edited: dawnofthenew on 14th Jan, 2005 - 7:35am


 
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