Who should have the kids in a divorce if both parents are of equal income, ability to rear the child and responsibility? Some people believe that the child should go with the mother since it is 'natural', others think that it is discrimination against the father who can give equal succor to the child. You may wish to discuss equal time sharing of the child, but realistically it is not possible. Often one parent will get the child on weekends and the other during the weekdays.
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Some people believe that the child should go with the mother since it is 'natural', others think that it is discrimination against the father who can give equal succor to the child |
International Level: Envoy / Political Participation: 241 24.1%
I think both mother or father could be great guardians for the child. I do know that most judges will grant the mothers to keep the child during week days, but it seems that at the present time this is changing dramastically as more fathers are having full custody of their children. Most of the time it is because the mother do not have a job or have some kind of mental disorder.
International Level: International Guru / Political Participation: 1089 100%
Well, in most states in the US now, at least as far as the law is concerned, neither parent has the edge in gaining custody. I think, in most families, the husband just concedes custody to the wife. However, if the father fights, he has as much a legal right as the mother.
I think, often, the father leaves the home and then pursues the divorce. Since he left the home, by the time they get to court, the mother has had custody. At that point, he must prove she is unfit in order to get custody away from her. More and more joint custody is awarded. If both parents live in the same community, this can absolutely work. In Massachusetts, most parents will end up with joint legal custody with one having physical custody. This means the non-custodial parent has as much right legally to control what happens to the child as the custodial parent. It also means the custodial parent cannot move out of the state with the child.
Unfortunately, if two adults decide to divorce, from a practical point, one of them must give up custody of the children. I still think, most women are more nurturing than most men. I think young children, especially, need the nurturing that doesn't come as naturally to a man. When my grandson falls down and bumps his head, I kiss it to make it better. His father tells him not to be such a whoose (sp) and stop crying. Of course, if he is really badly hurt, his father would be just as nurturing, but sometimes children just need the hug and to have the tears kissed away even though they aren't really all that hurt.
Edited: tenaheff on 19th Dec, 2004 - 7:52pm
International Level: Diplomat / Political Participation: 320 32%