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Friends Anyone? - Page 2

The word 'friend' is a very strong word indeed. I consider myself to have lots of acquaintances; people who I know and sometimes engage in activities with. However, the only person I consider my friend is my spouse, and she is my best friend. Supposed friends can be too fickle at times and not dependable, and there is too much time and investment in a 'friend' to be let down time and time again. I sometimes watch these movies where the main character has a best friend who they seem to do everything with, etc and I think to myself "Does a person like that really exist?"
My wife and I do everything together, we share good times and bad, we laugh and we cry, we love and fight. To me that is the definition of a friend, and I can't really say I can classify anyone else in my life that way.

Anyone Friends

That is excellent Malexander and to know it is your wife - even better. I think the same way about my wife - who needs outside friends when you have people who will stand up with you right at home.

Friends Anyone? Health & Special Psychology

I might use the term friend in conversation to describe an aquaintance, but I know the difference between the two. An aquaintance is merely an associate, but it is common to use the term friend when describing them. In other words, I might say to someone "I have this friend at work..." I see no harm in this. Use of the term friend doesn't really mean they are truly my friend it is just a term commonly used.

To me a friend isn't necessarily someone I can always be sure will be there for me, because we all make mistakes. However, a friend certainly wouldn't intentionally let me down. If a true friend makes a mistake and asks for forgiveness, they can remain my friend. However, if someone I consider a friend repeatidly does stuff to hurt me or disappoint me, they evenually will be demoted to aquaintance. I don't think this happens as a result of the first offense though. Unless, of course, it is a BIG offense.

I don't think monkeys could become my friends. They could become my pets. We often describe our pets as friends, but I don't believe they really are, in the true sense, friends. We love them, they are members of our family, but I don't think they have the capacity to be friends.

Edited: tenaheff on 23rd Sep, 2004 - 11:46pm

Page 2 Anyone Friends

First of all, someone you know, with whom you have had a shared past. There could be many potential friends of mine in China, but, unfortunately I was never there to meet them. Also, you must have some basic level of communication. So even if I met that person from China, I might not be able to develop a friendship with him. I could, because not all communications are by languages. We could communicate by gestures, but that would be pretty hard to do, and unless I will be visiting China regularly, not worth it. You must know each other - not only by name and looks but also by knowing the other's mind and how the other might react in certain situations. You will also have to mutually trust each other, and, most important of all, you must have fun with each other.

I don't think associates are beneath friends, but rather they include friends. Associates are just the first part of the definition - someone you know. The only difference is, friends have to have all the other qualities, while associates don't.

I kind of addressed that already. If you're a friend, then you must be an associate. If you're an associate, though, it doesn't necessarily mean you're a friend.

Unless they're those wonder monkeys on national geographic that are super intelligent and know sign language, I don't really think I'll have the patience to try and communicate with them - and communications, by my definitions is one of the things you need to have.

It doesn't always work according to the dictionary. There may be complications that cause you not to be a friend of someone even though you may like him, trust him, and know him.

No, a friendship must be mutual. If you don't like someone, then he cannot be your friend even though he likes you.

Anyone Friends

1. What does the word 'friend' mean to you?

I once read a quote that said "Your true friends are those who walk in when everybody else walks out." I believe that. That's my idea of a true friend. Life gets rough, and there are people who are only up for being your "friend" when life is grand and perfect. True friends are those who are going to stick by me when I'm making decisions that nobody else understands, or when I'm depressed, or when life is just really cruddy.

2. Do you understand the difference between friends and associates?

Most definately. An associate is somebody you can hang out with, but when it comes to having a deep level of a relationship, it's not really there. I have a lot of associates at school, but a lot of them I don't talk to or see outside of school.

3. Can a friend be demoted to associate or vice versa?

Yes. My old next door neighbor and I were the closest of friends for the first twelve years of our life. We were inseperable and we knew everything about each other. When we got into middle school she started hanging out with the wrong crowd, and suddenly none of her old friends were "cool enough" for her. So, now we're all in college, and she's working full time at a restraunt getting drunk and high on the weekends. It didn't matter how much we tried to be there for her and try to be good influences, she dropped us quickly.

4. If you are in the middle of a jungle with only monkeys around, could they become your friends based on your definition in #1 above?

I like monkeys.

As for the question of who chooses a friend, I think it's a little bit of you do and nobody does. Obviously you choose who you want to be friends with to a degree, but at the same time, it doesn't always work that way. I've met several people and my first thought was "Wow, I would love to get to know this person. I think we would make really great friends," but we just never had an opportunity to really develop a friendship. Then I've had those cases where I was like "Ha ha... there's no way we would ever be friends," but through classes or whatever, we've become great friends. I believe we choose, in the end, who are friends are, but we don't always choose who God places in our path to become our friend. If that made any sense whatsoever.

Friends Anyone?

Recently, I spoke with a guy that I can consider a friend by our definition here. He helped me out many times, even when it was not convenient for him to do so. I asked after his family and he discouragingly said they had left him. I know people that would be curious enough to seek after the cause and investigate, but in my case I relayed my 'sympathy' and then continued on another topic giving him chance to bring it up if he so desired rather than make him feel uncomfortable. I believe this is the true measure of friendship as well - unlike strangers the fact that you think about the feelings of the other person first before your own. I hate to be pressed, especially when you already have a difficult situation and someone is only interested in gratifying curiosity rather than simply helping - being a true friend.

"One measure of friendship consists not in the number of things friends can discuss, but in the number of things they need no longer mention."
-- Clifton Paul Fadiman

Friends Anyone - Page 2

1. What does the word 'friend' mean to you?

A friend is someone who I can relate to on a personal level. Someone I can trust with my most intimate details. My wife is my best friend. I have no secrets from her.

2. Do you understand the difference between friends and associates?

Yes, I know many people and associate with them regularly, but I don't trust them. Its not that I distrust, its that they hahaven'tarned trust.

3. Can a friend be demoted to associate or vice versa?

Associates can eventually be friends. So associates can be promoted to friend. I don't think a friend can be demoted to associate. What kind of circumstances would lead to that, that you would still want to associate with them but not be their friend.

4. If you are in the middle of a jungle with only monkeys around, could they become your friends based on your definition in #1 above?

No, monkeys are dirty and throw poo.

5. who chooses a friend?

In some cases, you choose your own friends. But in other cases, your friends choose you. You don't always conscientiously choose friends, sometimes it just happens.

I also would like to add that there are different levels of friends. I have several friends, not alot, but I trust them all differently. There is only one friend I have the knows everything about me and that I would trust with my life, and thats my wife. I have other friends, but they are on lower levels of the friendship ladder, though still close to my heart.

Friends Anyone Psychology Special & Health - Page 2

1. What does the word 'friend' mean to you?

Friendship is defined by unselfishness. If I am concerned about the welfare of another person to the point that I will make sacrifices to improve his or her life on an individual basis, I consider him or her my friend. I can consider somebody my friend while they consider me nothing at all, but more often the relationship grows in unselfish love mutually, not in a lopsided fashion. Friendship is prerequisite to true romance, and true love, or charity in the scriptural sense, is the pinnacle of friendship.

Friendship requires an emotional connection, but does not have to be based on long experience together. It is deeper than social interaction or cooperation. It is not necessarily measured in time, although time can be a component of friendship.

2. Do you understand the difference between friends and associates?

Yes. One can associate with others without having any communication beyond a superficial, businesslike level. I consider my coworkers associates or acquaintances. They are generally not my friends, although we are pleasant to each other.

3. Can a friend be demoted to associate or vice versa?

Friends generally either remain friends to some degree or become enemies to some degree. The neutral ground of 'acquaintance' is impossible to regain. Of course, people lose contact, but an old friend is still a friend, even after years without seeing each other.

4. If you are in the middle of a jungle with only monkeys around, could they become your friends based on your definition in #1 above?

They could not be my friends, because a relationship with a monkey would be purely social, not a deeper love for the individual. Although I would be able to project my emotions upon them, their actions are based on instinct, and they do not have the capacity to feel true friendship for me. However, I suppose by my definition I could in my own mind become a friend to them, depending on my mental and emotional state.